Day 19: first time doing in my life

Bismillah..

Pagi malam pagi malam.. dah 3 minggu aku internship kat sini.. hohoho.. and i had doing things that i had never done before.. kain buruk means y berminyak nampak bintik bintik hitam tu aku sangat geli untuk sentuh..  dah berminyak sikit.. atau dah bertukar color ckit tempat nya adalah tong sampah.. but now.. bukan takat kain buruk.. muntah budak pun aku tadahkan guna tangan aku.. could you imagine this situation.. even for my own niece or nephew.. i never do this before.. makanan yang diorang nak buang dari mulut dorang aku suruh dorang tadahkan guna tangan sendiri.. kalau lantai tempat jatuhnya makanan tu.. aku suruh mereka kutip balik or my other family member yang settlekan.. huhuhu..  but itu adalah masa laluku.. this is what we call survival kot..

kini dalam sejarah.. semalam.. aku lap and 3 orang budak dalam waktu yang berbeza.. owhh loya dan mual anak tekak nii.. yang sorang budak ni dah masuk 3 kali but this time makanan yang dia buang dah jadi muntah.. sebelum ni.. boleh2 dia datang kat aku dan buat muka nak muntahkan makanan yang dia kunyah dalam mulut tu..  hmmm.... geram dan rasa nak jer penyet2 buat nasi ayam penyet.. kalau first time xpe lagi.. ni harini.. ya allah.. budak budak ni.. mengada ngada tahap mintak ice cream..  tu xtermasuk budak yang xreti dan xtahu perasaan geli lagi.. boleh dia lalu dan pijak kat tempat muntah tu.. dah orang kata jangan.. yang jangan tu la naknya.. ya allah dugaan sungguh...

Yang sorang lagi budak masa tengahari masa nap time.. boleh terbatuk2 sampai terkeluar makanan yang dia makan membuak2.. mata dia terlelap lagi.. bukan kemain aku terkejut.. habis tempat tidur..dah tersedar buka mata tu sambung lagi muntah.. ya allah.. dalam sejarah sungguh...

Haa.. ni xtermasuk lagi dengan budak budak yang berhingus.. bukan sorang dua.. tapi kebanyakannya semua budak..dah ada hingus boleh pula lap guna tangan dia.. ok.. tu xpe lagi ni dok jilat hingus tu.. ya allah.. budak budak ni..  memang xcukup tangan sangat3.. tapi, entah-entah aku dulu jadi budak teruk dari ni.. hihi

Haa lagi yang budak2 berak.. ya allah.. sungguh banyak benda yang aku xpernah buat yang jarang2 y nampak xnampak aku buat sebelum ni dan nak xnak aku terpaksa buat buat masa ni.. Survival skill eh?

Xtau la nak cakap apa..  budak2 ni.. betul2 la...xtermasuk yang menangis.. yang bertekak.. semua rasa geram sangat.. betul2 nak penyet jadi ayam penyet..

Hmm.. semoga terbaik untuk kami yang daj jadi ayam penyet -,^

Love,

teamoHada

Day 17:different approaches.. everything is different ..

Bismillah...

Hmm.. for the today.. this was what i feel.. i would like to share my first and three toddlers at my practicum place..

I understand when she is using her tantrum skill.. but i don't know which skill should i use to calm her.. yes she was just a toddler.. and she were just not more than 3 years.. should i shout.. should i use my loud voice.. should i still calm.. should i ask her.. do you need hug? The more i go to her the more i try to calm her.. the more she use all her strength..  she is Sukaynah 3 year old.. cute.. brown  hair.. straight hair.. 

I understand when you cannot sleep.. cant close your eyes when you have a rainy nose.. i even cant close my eyes.. should i force you.. should i use other teacher name that you scared to make you listen to me..should i make a story or sing a lullaby.. you are Rabihah.. 3 year old.. have curly brown hair.. have pretty eyes that anybody see you will fall to love you..

I understand that you love food that much.. i love food too.. no i means.. i crazy about food.. and i understand that you are near to 3 years old and your curiosity just grow bigger.. you walk.. you run to the area that are not allowed you at that time.. what can i do for you.. you are not listened to me.. you are listen only when i said the rewarded was food.. should i use that way to the end of the day for everyday.. that is means.. food must always be with me.. i prevent my self to use loud voice.. shout to you or to your friend was not my choice.. you are Amni.. almost 3 year old.. black hair and love hanging with her brother Ammar..

This is just the beginning... the tough day that you through might be different then me.. i am going to try my best everyday..

I want everyday for you and your friend is happy and happier.. from the morning to the evening.. when you are happy i am also happy.. when you are crying i am also crying....and that is why i need you and your friends to be happy so i could be happy too.. the smile of yours.. the laugh of your just give me a big heart to be more appreciate of what i am doing now..

Love,

teamoHada

Day 16: more to understand the toddler

Bismillah..

Now is 1.50am in the morning means that yesterday was my 3rd week as practicum student and actually i feel so much awesome with those little kids.. and tired.. more exciting..

For the kids name.. i begin to remember all their name and things too but some of still quite hard for me.. yesterday might be my mistake when i changing their drypers who are not belong to them.. but it's still okay after being realize by their other teacher.

For the third week i had learn the each kids attitude.. not all but some of them i know what is their abilities and what they are special with. Why she is cry.. why she is need help.. why they acted like that or those.. and i try my best to be the same to all kids.. to listen their words.. but after all i know i lack many things too compare with many teachers with bigger experience than myself.

The thing i still can't control is they hardly to listen my instruction. Sometime i do feel some of fail..  i try to not use my loud speaker. But after all i know they just a little toddler who are active and they are developing their personalities for their character in the future.

And the things that still not changing from the first day to my third week is.. how difficult for parents to smile or say thank you for a teacher when the teacher open their car door and hold their kids hand or carry them. Sad to this kind of parents. Its not that hard to smile or say thank you.. when you do this kind of things Insyaallah that will bring positive environment to your kids.. the teacher will feel appreciate.. the kid will be happy too in the morning..

Other than that.. i try to adapt with this environment.. i know that my expectation to the placed that i had dream for my practicum before this just so high.. i dream of the great place.. but then.. this is just a place that i get.. i met with this kind of teacher.. this kind of school.. this kind of principle.. yes.. the high expectation different just because there are a different between study and working.. really different.. what you are study you might not see in your working style.. but the knowledge.. the skill that you had learned is needed for yourself..

Okay that all for today.. and for those little boy.. i do feel sad.. i hope that there will be a silver lining for him.. and i promised that i will with him..

Love,

teamoHada

Day 10:Am i smart? Am i wise?

Bismillah

Hmm.. i have many words to say.. to share during my past 6 days.. but yesterday just a really a worse day for me.. i feel so disappointing.. sad.. bad.. sympathy.. and i do cry..

Today there are situation that really break my heart so much.. two different situation and i don't expect this could be happen.. yes i wish to pull him.. i wish to hug him.. i wish that i could make him calm and run from you.. it's break my heart triple when the eyes looked at me for help but i do nothing.. how bad i am..  yes i do angry.. but i won't let my self to do those kind of things.. yes i do poor my little baby doll.. i feel so much sad that i could say i cry when i'm trying to cure her.. i was shock that stop my heart beating.. but i won't let my self to do the things that you did..  now..i miss my little baby doll.. i want hi 5 with her.. say love her.. looked at her pretty eyes..hmm.. the situation..hmm i was just like a mouse.. and yes yes yes i am just afraid of anything and everything in future happen and that is why i keep quiet..  but please do not let the banana fruit two time.. no and never!

But anyway i still do wrong.. if just i'm earlier.. than it won't happen.. if i'm just more aware, this won't happen.. and both of you won't hurt.. it's different way of hurt but still do make me like the worse one.. and if just i care and concern more.. i promise my baby doll.. you will be fine with me..

Yes this situation.. there are a morale.. there are a value that i can learned from that but i'm afraid of myself getting far from my positive mind.. i'm afraid of not being the good one.. i'm afraid if not being more sincere and chooser.. and i'm more afraid in future that i won't practice that what should i practice with...

Help me Allah.. let me be someone with fair and square.. i'm not ask for perfection.. but don't let me use my hand.. my loud voice for no good..  don't let me Allah.. let me be a someone that special for them.. the one that can make them feel fun.. and the one that can make them feel strong.. please Allah.. keep me motivate myself.. to listen them every words.. and they listen myself to every single word i'm saying.. to not be biased and loved each of them in their own abilities.. Allah keep my eyes good for them.. keep my ear good.for them.. and always good for them.. Aamiin.. Insyaallah

Like the one that i adore said.. and i do really have to balance my mind really well.. i have to control my speak loud words.. and also have to improve my action as well..

The smart will talk immediately.. the wise will pause -AA- yes yes yes.. this is what i have did yesterday.. just now feel like a mouse.. afraid for nothing.. am i the smart? Am i the wise? what shall i do for the coming 90 days.. please let the all good one will i make.. please let me see positive environment.. please don't let me give up.. and let me stay believe from everything that i believe.. 

Love,

teamoHada

Day 2: saling berminta maaf dan meminta maaf

Today my second day internship.. today was different from yesterday..

7 am
A senior (Halah) tolong ambil blkng pintu kolej.. lps tu sampai dlm pukul 7.20 kot..

7.30 am
Turun p jemput children.. ambil brng diorang.. turun naik juga tangga.. and ada children y siap nangis dan kena dukung lagi pepagi..huk3

8 am
Then mandikan children.. lps tu ada aktiviti y 100 percent kita orng handle.. ohh.. kita orng xde bt lesson plan pun lagi..

9 am
Children get ready to eat their breakfast. Today they eat fried mee

9.30 am
Start their activity. Singing.. dancing

11 am
Get ready for their lunch

11.30 am to 3pm
Change their pampers.. get their naps..

Okay ada sorang children  ni.. dari pagi sampai pukul 1.45 pm menangis dan perlu didukung.. okay sangat lenguh tangan ni.. xmo dgn teacher lain.. huk2.. tapi bila senyum.. berbaloi la.. skrng dah tido...

Skrngt teringatbko patem.. ya allah.. she's die young.. sad.. allah nak suruh aku beringat.. sebab tu aku rasa perlunya kita berminta maaf dan sentiasa memaafkan..

We never know for how long we live for what a reason we die.. die young or die old.. ya allah.. put her in the best place.. 

Aku habis sampai pukul 6pm

Huhuhu

This baby cry.. this baby smile.. that is what make her adorable and special.. esok2 dah jangan nangis lagi k.. teacher love you.. hik3

Qaireen <3

Love,

teamoHada

Day 1: senyum dan gembira

Alhamdullillah.. today is my first day training.. lot of things that i see.. and its different from what i have learn and study.. yess yes.. that was the reality..

Pukul 7.30
Masuk and terus divide our tugasan.. sorang helping kat dapur and sorang p amik and jemput children masuk school

Pukul 8.00
P masuk jumpa dengan madam.. ada lagi briefing sbb mdm.. the principle xsetuju waktu y ditetapkan oleh supervisor kami which is 9 to 5.. so our timetable nyer 8 to 6.. huk3.. and we divide the children too into group..

Pukul berapa dah xsure..

Tolong bukakan baju.. i means suruh the children make by themself.. mndikan children y belum mandi..then diorang p breakfast.. nasi impit dengan sup..huk3.. then ada la aktiviti.. nyanyi2 lompat2..berlari lari..

Tepat pukul 11 kot not sure..
Diorang p lunch makan nasi dgn telur dan sup pagi tadi..

Pukul 12
Diorang take a nap.. diorang tidur sampai pukul 3 or 3.30..

Oh kejap ada 2 children baru daftar y asyik nangis..

Lebih kurang pukul 1.15
P teman teacher p amik children yang transit.. ohhh

Then dlm pukul 2 to 2.30
Get ready for the children to wake up.. p basuh botol susu and buatkan susu yang baru..

Dlm pukul 3 lebih2
Children bangun. Dan minum petang   makan rainbow cake. After makan bwa mereka semua mandi..oh ada sorang berak.. and.. huhuhu

Pukul 4 la kot
P kat circle area and tengok preschool solat.. bwa semua toddlers tu kesitu..

Pukul 6
Boleh balik..

Okay.. semua todd kena buat sendiri.. teacher kena observe jer..

And i have 2 week observation.. okay boleh dah start slow2 buat lesson plan..huk3..

Yes yes.. i'm happy with them.. the cute and adorable children.. jump like a monkey.. sleep like a snake.. Walk like a turtle.. run like a rabbit.. just so adorable children..

And around 8 pm.. i got a sad new.. my cousin.. my childhood friend too just passed away.. may Allah bless u faten..

love,

teamoHada

100 days positive words

These day.. what is all in my mind just full of negative words.. negative action.. i could not control what is in my minds.. what is my action and attitude.. i could not even control my eyes to cry.. it's just a feeling that is so bad.. yes yes.. i keep telling my self i can do it.. i am alright.. i am okay.. but.. i could not lie myself that actually i am not at all okay..

Just a few hours ago i got a call from a friend.. a very lucky me to have a friend like them.. she give me a spirit.. she is telling me to not be a sad.. she told me that is okay.. and more than that.. she is helping me to heal a little worry inside of this small heart.. yes even though the worry is still flying everywhere but there is people that beside me.. thank you.. thank you for your past help,presents and for your future help.. sorry for trouble you for the past,present and for the coming day...

I believe that i will keep complain to you..you or you.. i will telling you everything that is what i believe is okay to sharing and tell.. and i believe that you might be bored, might be tired to listen, might be exhausted to give opinion or advice.. but still i need you to give me support.. yes i know i should not depend to you people but after all i'm just the human.. and because of that i believe that it's okay for me to not be okay..

Tomorrow is the day that i had waiting for.. i hope for the best.. please let me do the best.. for the 100 days coming.. i pray for the best.. help me Allah.. and within this 100 day. I pray that i can do better.. i pray that i can learn and experience this journey.. yeayh.. i hope so..

Dear kiddies,dear my future students, dear toddlers,dear babies, dear my sweet,cute and adorable children... i promised that i will learn and trying my best to not be angry, to be fun and enjoyable, to be special to you and you are special to me, to understand you, listen you, to be patience and acknowledge everything.. and share with everyone the moments that belong us within 100 day..

Pray for me#100days positive words#100 days to lose 10kg#100days to keep positive#100 days to be fun#let us spread love and positive mind...

Love,
teamoHada

Nursery Posting early childhood

Yesterday my friend i went to the place that where we are posting to.. and the first expression that we get from the principle just make us nervous..our heart beat just cant be infinity count.. apart from that we are just more dissapointed with the place that we are posting to. We still have to pay for our rent.. we have no allowance, we have to pay for transport,food and material that we are gonna to use.. and the best part is our place just not like what i imagine with.. yesterday i don't think out of the box even with thinking with the glue and close box with tape side to side..

Walking alone using ktm,erl to putrajaya make me more sensitive and unbreakable feeling.. my feeling just so so.. i have keep trying positive my self.. keep telling myself that it's alright..  but the negative  side will be follow after in the second.. just same as today..my mind just so so.. i will keep myself positive..okay its fine.. that just started..

You know.. this was just beginning.. and it's gonna be more tough day by day.. and i just dont know what will i through.. my friend and i at that place we have to go through this, those and that and make this,those and that as the best or first experience and journey.. this is learning.. this is a journey.. but after all the learning and the journey that we are gonna have is we have to sacrifice more..

And now i should have to think how to be saving even that just not possible to make..

Crying

Make us strong.. may my friend and i can work well together.. we have to be complete each other.. helping each other and listen to each other.. it's seem possible but nothing is impossible.. we might fight.. we might hurt but help us to not take those feeling went to deep.. pray us to be forgive and forget.. pray us to be well working.. and make this as our learning.. may Allah bless us..

Gud luck all my friend that is going to practical.. we may have different experience.. different place but still we have the same journey.. may Allah bless us all.. make us strong and keep positive.. Insyaallah.. Aamiin..

11th OGOS 2014 to 7th NOVEMBER 2014

Love,
teamoHada

boycott issue - Gaza vs Israel 😬

There are some of us did not understand why we should boycott and boycott with appropriate way and good manner.

Nak boikot tidak salah dan di alu alukan tak nak memboikot pun tidak salah dan tidak wajib.. y salah adalah cara memboikot dengan menggunakan perkataan kesat, menyuruh pekerja berhenti kerja,meludah kepada pekerja dan membaling atau merosakkan..  dan mereka yang tidak memboikot pula tidak perlu lah mengutuk mereka yang   memboikot.. they hv their own way to help them not only just for pray and giving money.. yes yes this matter were not easier to be settled even with boycott. But it just a little thing that might help..

Memboikot juga bukan hanya kerana agama tetapi kerana penindasan terhadap mereka yang tidak bersalah apatah lagi terhadap kanak-kanak yang masih kecil,ibu-ibu yang mengandung yang dibunuh tanpa belas ihsan. Put yorself inside of them. Can you see.. You lost ur home? ur parents die ? Ur children lost you? You lost part of your body? You lost your children? You see everywhere is blood?  If this happen to you or me.. i believe that you or me would just want that was only nightmare.. nauzubillahiminzalik.. And believe this also.. if this..penindasan terjadi kepada mereka yang bukan beragama islam juga.. there..will be a people that going fight over them too. Is not just islam but it's humanity..

Memboikot dengan hanya sesetengah product juga bukan kesalahan besar kerana itu adalah perkara yang susah untuk dilaksanakan apatah lagi product-product tersebut telah menjadi darah daging. Tetapi mengutuk mereka yang memboikot sesetengah product pula adalah mereka yang cepat memandang rendah pada usaha yang kecil.

Membandingkan kehidupan di malaysia dan digaza pula adalah seperti membandingkan antara langit dan rumput..  we only can see their lose but we never taste their pain..

Menggunakan facebook pula sebagai medan adalah perkara yang normal dan universal. Sepertimana pada zaman dahulu mengutus surat dan menulis artikel sebagai jalan protes dan jalan penyebaran sesuatu maklumat samada yang tidak benar dan yang benar. Kenapa tidak manfaatkan teknologi yang ada itu?

Kita hidup bukan untuk selamanya..  jangan lupa kita xtahu apa yang terjadi hari esok dgn keselesaan yang kita kecapi hari ini.. yaa kita hidup di malaysia bukan di gaza.. tapi tidak semestinya kita menutup mata, hati dan akal dengan apa yang terjadi diluar sana.. hubungkan sel-sel otak kita yang berkembang itu dengan perkara yang positif.

Ikuti perkembangan dari anak malaysia yang hidup di gaza.. follow this young man.. bertahun tidak dapat pulang ke malaysia (Nadir Al-Nuri).. you may found yourself how difficult the real situation out there.. for him.. for the small children.. for the older.. for the people.. pray for gaza#free for palestine# ketakutan kita kegerunan kita tidak sedalam apa yang mereka lalui. We are just weak to compare then them..

Perang gaza israel

Bismillah..

Hmm malam ni cik wan hada xboleh nak tidur lg.. sekarang dah pukul 3.45. Sanggup p charge phone mati.. okay untungnya tefon kita.. bila mati charge kejap boleh hidup balik.. dan kita... dah mati xboleh dah hidup balik.. hidup pun nanti dekat padang masyar.. ya allah die me in solehah.. aamiin..

Okay sebab unexpected thing happen tonite.. rasa macam nak update blog..

Tadi before batery phone kong.. buka fb kejap lps tgk running man.. then cik wan hada ni terbaca la satu status ni pasal kenapa perlu boikot.. hmm tau2 jela.. product yang kita perlu boikot mmg banyak.. tetapi kita boikot la semampu yang kita rasa kita boleh.. status seorang kawan ni buat cwh rasa sangat sedih.. sedih sangat dan xsangka commenter yang sebegitu boleh datang darinya.. oleh kerana itu.. cwh telah membalas komen status updatenya dengan "too sad with you SR... read.. read a lot"... dan dia reply dengan why? Xcukup membaca ka dia.. fikir sejenak.. sblm menjadi keyboard warrior.. sesungguhnya i don't want to make this continue bigger or become problem with this friend.. so masa nak reply dan susun kata2 supaya tidak menjadi perselisihan faham .. tefon mati..

And when i switch on back.. he removed me as his friend.. rasa funny jga.. with one comment i had just being removed..

Dan begitulah manusia.. setiap pandangan sentiasa berlainan.. dan kelainan menjadikan sesuatu perkara itu luar biasa,rumit dan istimewa.oleh itu kita perlu tahu manfaatkan kelainan.. dan bukan dengan keputusan terburu2.. i don't lose anything.. i am still and holding with my own prinsip.. believe..

Gaza had so much suffer because of israel.. they killed the small little children.. they ruined their home,school,mosque and the worst thing they bombed the hospital.. where they need a place to less their pain.. is this HUMAN? everyday the children lose their family.. lose their friend.. their life not even like us.. we sleep.. we eat.. we even watching running man leisurely.. yes we think about them.. yes we feel pity.. yes we feel sad.. but inside some of us there are no empathy..  and that is why when a small thing we can do to help them.. why we don't? And when we loud, shout a word to boycott those product why you have to condemn? Why you those people who don't want to boycott talk like you are living this world alone? Just keep silent when you don't want to do.. people who shout and said, please boycott.. please boycott.. they don't even can't boycott at all.. but they are trying.. you are condemn them.. your words toward them just to strong.. it is true what some of people say " better you pray,sedekah" yes it is true.. but you have to know that boycott those product can help them..

It is just sad because those words come from you my dear friend.. do you know why.. again.. because they killed the children.. they killed their families.. the small children that i can't imagine how it's feel.. loses and pain..

About the workers.. we are not against them.. they should not be worry.. they are not going to be bombed.. they might be just lost their work.. we are against the company, product that colloborate with israel..  for me itself.. i have to give up for many things.. but i know i can't give up at all.. because the product.. we have use all over ages.. we have ate.. but now.. we may stop.. just slowly.. and slowly.. but still there are many people just against and condemn.. we against those product because they proudly said that they will help israel.. so why we still use them? They help israel and they killed those people.. the people that have no wrong..

why we need to boycott.. it' just because we might help them.. believe..

Let boycott mc donald this friday!

Those children did'nt play freely.. lets #Free Palestine#Free Gaza#Save the Children..  let we help them by doing small help together..

Love,
teamoHada

Time fly

time please go fast.. i cant stay here at all.. i cant.. time please go forward.. i hv to move on.. this life.. people word seem cruel.. human attitude seem crazy..ease these feeling..

Just be sfs.. stay sfs dear me and you..

Quote raya2014

Always try to be more sensitive about people's feelings. because there are times when a tear means happiness and a smile means hurt.

I means it a lot..

Be strong..

Love,
teamoHada