Sunday, September 23, 2018

Hungry

I can list one for now

Hungry
If you stress, when you hungry you go to eat and you eat.
If you depress, when you hungry you don't go to eat and you don't eat.

Now.  I really hungry. I eat 1 and half roti canai during breakfast, 2 keropok in evening dan mungkin half choc bread after finish the event. Now at 12 midnight I really really feel hungry.

At least I got food to ate.  Why not thankful?

I delivered my task today. Not so great but I just done. I'm not proud myself. In crowded people at least 100 ++ people there I feel so alone and lonely.

Once upon a time I don't remember when exact year ago.  I wish to hold a mic. I thought she/he is so cool. Everyone have an eyes for her/him. But when my wish I think came true. I just not so proud of myself. I thought of what people think of me.  And this is ridiculous. Why the thought mess my mind?

Why I am so not thankful? 

Always take things take people for granted.

And I hungry and go to eat something.

H for me  H for hungry
teamoHada

Monday, September 3, 2018

A little brighter day

Bismillah and Alhamdulillah.

Today I feel more better. Through ups and down my emotion journey is just really tough. I know I need to help myself through the adventure itself.

From home to work to self. It's all turning around 390 degree. Not a day or 2 day. But every second I breathe. Sangat sesak dengupan jantung seperti jatuh dari bangunan yang tinggi dan ditikam menggunakan senjata tajam. Very pain.

I sleep early switch off light early and like to stay in the dark.  Light gave me pain. Headache and anxious. And during I sleep I walk. My brain still processing. With one after another dream. And when in the morning. The dream keep disturbing my days. Suffocate.

Ya Allah.
Ya Allah.
Ya Allah.

If I am in pain. Please Allah let be only me. If I'm in hurt with human word please reward me with sabar. And turn me someone better than they and I think of me.

O'Allah guide me with light path. Guide me to my ambition. Guide me to be what I want to be and what I want to have. Help me Allah. 

Ya Rahman.  Give me your love. Please let me feel your love.. I want your love.

Ya Rahim. Kasihi aku. Jangan sisihkan Aku ya Allah. Jika suatu hari aku hilang dalam kasih sayang manusia itu mungkin lebih baik dari kehilangan rasa kasih dari mu Ya Allah. Tuhanku. Penciptaku.

Jangan tinggalkanku Tuhan

Anxious,
tH